Day 271 The Perfect Mom Project

The Civil War is over, it ended yesterday at 2:45 PM. I had volunteered to help chaperone the reenactment of the Civil War that the 8^th grade history classes were having at Avery's middle school, and I ended up standing in the blazing sun for three straight hours. I decided to help out at the last minute, thinking that this would be one of my last chances to help out; once she steps through the doors of the high school my hands on volunteering will be limited. Supervising middle school kids is just not my gift. I learned that during my two year stint as a substitute lunch mother. Something about being around swarms of kids with raging hormones makes me very uncomfortable, yet I wanted to be there for Avery.

 So there I stood in the sun on one of the hottest days so far this year. At some point during my three hours one of the other parent volunteers pointed out to me that other parents were coming in bringing large slushy drinks to some of the kids. One parent had gone out and picked up eight of them brought them back and then went out and bought twenty more. I could not help but wonder how a person decides that it is OK to provide these drinks to some of the kids when there were at least 200 more kids that were not going to have one of these drinks. First of all, these were parents that I like and respect and the fact that they were running out buying these things with no consideration for the other kids bugged me, what were they thinking? There was no way I was going to run out and buy slushies for Avery and the other soldiers in her tent. First of all I had volunteered to help supervise not make drink runs second of all I have a problem with bringing things into a group of kids if I do not have enough for everyone.

 Moments like that remind me how differently everyone thinks and especially how differently we all parent. I guess it also made me feel like the unfun, uncool mom, because I was not going to do a slushie run for my daughter. The thought also crossed my mind that there were now hormonally challenged students ramped up on a very large amount of sugar! Mainly, I spent a good amount of time (in the hot sun) wondering if I was ever going to make it to perfect Mom status if I had to always worry if I was doing the right thing or not. When will it be OK to just be the Mom that I am? I did end up taking Avery and Aly out for ice cream after school that was my shot at making up for the no slushie thing.

 One thing I did figure out yesterday was that I will always see parents that have to go over and above for their kids all the time. While I want all my girls to be successful and happy, I do believe that I have to leave a majority of the responsibility for that to them. Someday, mom is not going to be around to help them with the bumps in life's road and if I am always standing there with a slushie or a wad of cash to fix their life, how will they know how to make it over the bump? Overall, my gift to my children will be my hand to help them balance and my love as my support. The rest is up to them.