Monday, December 21, 2009

Day 120 The Perfect Mom Project


Here we are in the home stretch, Christmas eve is just three days away. I wish I could say I am good to go, but I am not. I still have some shopping to do, some wrapping to do and some baking to do. Oh! And I still need to go grocery shopping!! HELP!! Since my families response to "What would you like for Christmas this year?" was "I don't know, I cannot think of anything". It has been very tough.

More of my holiday frustration right now is coming from not being mentally prepared. I keep getting bogged down in thoughts about family stuff that I cannot change. After yesterday, when I
realized that I was trying too hard with my girls my sister sent me this:


Dear Ragen, I do not need your help today, Love God.


Wow, that hit home. I sent my sister a message telling her that I like to think of myself as God's trusty sidekick, but apparently that is not necessary. I know I have been focusing on all the wrong things. Both of my girls have told me that it does not feel like the holidays to them either, and I want to do something to fix that for them, but I have to fix it for myself first. Perhaps that is where the above message comes in. Maybe I need to just let go and let God step in and help us out on this. I am to busy stomping around like Godzilla all ticked off about every little thing and I am not focusing on the bigger picture.


All this stuff we are doing, all the gifts we are buying are not what Christmas is about. I think it is time to hand over my stress to the one who can handle it best. I assume from his message, that he would prefer that anyway. It is easy to say, but tougher to do, especially when right in the heart of my holiday madness my washing machine breaks down! I have to stay calm and just keep pitching this stuff to The One who can handle it.


I will hit the ground running today, I must pick up Aly from a sleepover, and call the repair man for my washer, go grocery and Christmas shopping, finish my baking AND breath...just breath...

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