Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Day 38 The Perfect Mom Project

In the last couple of days both of my girls have had some disappointment. Yesterday Avery had her Builders Club elections. She was running for President and she was feeling pretty confident. She had prepared a speech to share before the elections and had made sure that it was the allotted time in length. Unfortunately, she lost the election, to a friend. Avery shared with me that when she heard the results that she turned to her friend and smiled and then said, "Oh, that's awesome, congratulations!" Avery also shared with me that inside she did not feel like that.

Aly had try outs several days last week for the upcoming high school play. She tried for several parts and was even called back for three of them. She was so excited that she barely made it through the weekend. Monday morning she asked her Dad to drive her to school early (I am as shocked as you that I was not driving!) so that she could see the cast list as soon as it went up. Just before school started the list went up and I got the call. She had not gotten a main part. She had gotten a rather small role. She was very sad, she had her expectations set very high.

The one thing I have tried to convey to the girls since they were very small is that everything happens for a reason. I feel that we all get what we need when we need it. I have told them both that not getting these desired opportunities opens them up to so many more opportunities. It sounds great, but the sting of the defeat is still fresh. The fact that there will be something better out there later means nothing right now.

As their Mom I am sad for them. I want them to have everything and be everything, but that is not realistic. I know how much more I appreciate things that I have had to wait for. I also know how much I appreciate things I have worked for. In the next few days they will begin to heal from their disappointment and move forward and I will be there cheering them on. To get up and move forward is a much greater accomplishment then wallowing in bitterness and sadness. It is not the easiest accomplishment, it is however the sign of self respect and self confidence. These qualities will come in very handy when the time is right and the new opportunities come knocking.

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