All Avery said was "You did not make a copy of that picture like you said you would." That was it! I replied, "I HAVE BEEN A LITTLE BUSY THIS WEEK!" Something about her comment just shot me right over the edge. I started making all these lists in my head of all the things my family was "supposed" to do and did not. I was also making lists in my head of all the things I had done for everyone else this week, including spending the entire day yesterday getting things ready for Aunt Nina's move on Monday. Avery kept saying how what she said was just a comment, but I was insulted. I have driven these kids everywhere including appointments. I have done a ton of laundry and tried to make meals out of pretty much nothing, since I have not had time to go the store. The worst part is she said this to me as I was making dinner.
I think the scale is not balanced evenly. Why is it OK for my kids to not pick up their stuff when I tell them or shut off the TV or computer when I tell them? How about when I just ask them to help me out around the house, dusting or vacuuming? You would think I was asking them to jump in front of a moving bus! Now I do not copy a picture and I am called out about it. The worst part is I do not remember making that promise and if I did it was probably something like, "Mom, can you make a copy of that picture for me?" and I responded, "Sure". Suddenly with my acknowledgement of the request I am indebted to my 13 year old. "Sure", can mean a lot of things including, I am not sure what you are asking me but I should respond, so I will…sure! Now I am trying to figure out why she could not make the copy herself.
The picture I have of my daughter today is that she expects a lot from me, but does not feel that she has to follow through with the expectations I have of her. The hard part is that the best lesson would be to leave her in a lurch a couple of times and see how she likes it, but I cannot do that. I know we will have to talk about this whole thing, but right now I just feel unappreciated and only important enough to do laundry, make dinner and copy pictures. Oh, and to drive my kids everywhere! I am steaming angry and I know that I need to cool off before I discuss this any further. My last attempt at discussion last night left me standing in the middle of my kitchen yelling at Avery and Mark. Not a pretty sight! I guess this just proves that, if Momma ain't happy, ain't nobody happy. I know that I am feeling a lot of pressure and I feel like we did not have a soft landing from our vacation, we fell! We fell back into our real life and we are standing in the middle of a yard that is well past needing to be mowed, it now needs to be harvested. We also fell into my Aunts needs and my kid's needs and my houses needs. I have been running nonstop since we got back and I am getting nowhere and I am dangling from the ledge, so the best bet is to stay clear of me until I cool off!
After soccer and play practice today, we head out to Ashleigh's to visit and pick up my sweet puppy Roxanne (absence makes the heart grow fonder!). I am looking forward to hanging out with my daughter and son-in-law. I guess I need a break from my post vacation week or a vacation from my vacation!
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