[You are one sassy senior! You're outspoken and independent, the life of every senior center function. Sure, you may be a bit racy, but somehow that only seems to make people like you more. One wiggle of your good hip, and all the old men come a-runnin' (very slowly and carefully, perhaps with a nurses assistance.]
I hope that when the time comes, that is the truth! After dealing with all of the issues with my Aunt Nina, I truly hope that I do not give up and make life difficult for the people trying to care for me. She told me over the weekend she hopes she does not live to see another Christmas. She refuses to have a radio or TV in her room and she does not want us to bring anything in that would make her more comfortable at the care center, and now, she wants to go home. I do not think so!
The hard part is that I get it; she wants to be in her own home with her own things. She wants to be in the house she shared with her husband. She wants to feel independent, but she is not. She talks a good game. She can convince you that she feeds herself and walks around on her own and even dresses herself, then you ask someone and you find out that she is not doing all of those things. She is sharp, I will give her that? She prides herself on her memory; she also can be down right mean. If she is unhappy with something I am saying or doing she will say, “I am sorry I am a burden”.
Here is the thing, she is not a burden, but she can be a big pain. She expects a lot for services that Mark and I volunteer to do for her. She is not willing to give an inch, but we must bend over backwards to please her. The problem is we are becoming disgruntled! We are feeling like we are not appreciated and we are getting tired of playing the “How do we help Aunt Nina, without her knowing what we are doing” game. We are constantly calling people and coordinating things for her that she does not even realize we are doing. We use our own time and gas and do not expect reimbursement.
Yesterday, when I called Aunt Nina, she told me that a friend (her ex Son-in-law’s girlfriend, weird I know) was looking into an assisted living facility for her. I stayed calm, (considering I had been on the phone looking into things for her and about her during the day) and told her that she needed to tell her “friend” that I was taking care of it and that it was not necessary for her to do that. I also expressed to her that if she preferred this “friend” to handle this stuff that was fine, but let me know. Think about it, I have had attorneys working with us, social workers and care coordinators for the last three years and in walks the “friend" and now she is running around doing Aunt Nina’s bidding? I do not think so! Who the heck is this person, and why is she doing this?
Do not dink around with me! Mark and I (and some of our friends) have put time and energy into a lot of things for Aunt Nina since the day her daughter passed away three years ago. I am pretty sure we can handle this. It may not be in the time frame she wants, or even exactly how she wants it, but the job gets done. As I prepare to get back on the phone today to investigate more information for my Aunt, and also to do banking for her, I will try to remain calm and not let my aggravation shine through.
I sincerely hope that I am a sassy senior. One that is willing to live a full life up until it is time for me to leave my earthly bindings. I do not want to skimp on one minute of the life I have. I owe it to myself and to the people (most likely my children) that are caring for me to be as involved as I can. One thing is for sure though; I will not be wiggling my hips at any men. I have the best man here with me, and I do not want to mess up a good thing!
Todays Photo is of a young Aunt Nina
No comments:
Post a Comment