Day 177 The Perfect Mom Project

Attitude is everything! I know this, because I have a 15 year old that is in the, "I hate" phase of teen hood. I think if she uses the phrase "I hate" one more time, I am going to scream! I am not even sure how to help get her through this, because she is many times so unpleasant to deal with. Sometimes it is out of nowhere that she suddenly hates something. A few weeks ago at dinner she announced that she "hates" rice. All I could say to her was "No you don't." Obviously, if she thinks she hates it, what I think will not matter. It might actually make her hate it more!

 Last night, Mark read me something that said that the harder someone is to love, the harder you have to try. It is not that I don't love my daughter, but she is making it kind of tough to like her. Her perpetual bad attitude has made me very unsympathetic. I am really fading in the cheerleading capacity. How many times do I have to try to turn that frown upside down? The other issue is that there are times that my mind is telling me to keep quiet and say nothing and suddenly my mouth flies open and I cannot stop myself from making a comment about whatever it is that is currently being hated. I am starting to think I am not helping the situation.

 Perhaps Mark has the right idea though. Maybe if I reach out a little more with love and compassion and fewer suggestions. I might have to regroup on my parenting skills a little. It just does not seem like what I am doing is helping her. This is when a really good book on perfect mothering might come in handy. I would immediately look for the chapter, How to mother without your child knowing that's what you are doing. I am certain the fact that I keep telling her "Change your attitude and change your life" is probably making her hate me too.

 I will do some investigating today to see if there are any suggestions from actual professionals on what steps to take with her. What I have been doing has not worked, so it is time to take this more seriously. If we are not careful she might not grow out of this and then what will we do. We will have this adult hater that everyone will look at and wonder what her parents did to make her like that. You see that is my biggest issue, I do not want anyone to think I made my daughter a hater! I hope that my studies today will help find the answers I need to turn this thing around, because I "hate" her attitude! Hmmm…I wonder where she gets it from?