CRAZY Busy

I have finally realized…okay that is a lie. I have known and ignored for a very long time that I have to be busy all the time or I get depressed. Its nuts but that’s who I am. The major trouble with my issue is that I sometimes become so busy that nothing I do is complete or done well. Being extremely busy also makes everything in my life rush by as I hurry here and there and try to get all my business done.

I have so much crammed into the next three weeks that my head feels like it is going to pop off. How do you teach yourself to savor life and slow down? What makes a person crave constant activity? Several years ago a friend pointed this issue out to me and I thought she was crazy. “What are you talking about?” I said. My dear friend replied “You are happier when you are busy, I can see that, can’t you? I stepped back looked and realized that she was right. I like planning and keeping busy it is who I am. I accept that now, it is just that I would like to temper the busy with a little less crazy.

My busy thermometer will go down towards the end of October, but in the mean time…my house is upside down. We have no furniture other than a recliner in our living room while we wait to have our wood floors refinished. Why drag furniture in when you will have to drag it out soon. I have endless creative ideas that I am implementing throughout my house that I stop and start on at will, hoping to finish by the time our floors are redone so everything looks “just so” at the end of it all. Just for fun, I also have six yards of mulch to put into my yard. I did some work on this yesterday and I will be back at it today. I had to stop working in my yard yesterday so that I could make dinner for myself and Avery (my youngest). Mark is out of town and I like to savor the alone time with my youngest when I can. I then had to shower and prepare to run a meeting about our high school seniors all night party at the end of the year. Just one more thing on my list of THINGS I GOTTA DO!

You can see that being busy is all self inflicted. I see it and you see it yet, my hand is the first to go up and mouth is the first one to flap its gums.  I then come home confess to my family and hang my head while they just shake theirs. It is a little game we play it’s not pretty, but until I decide crazy busy is too busy, this will be my life. I suspect that I will live like this through the remainder of this school year. Rushing and busy and lapping up every single moment with my youngest daughter that I can. Apparently this is what makes me happy.