The Contract

Recently my girls attended their Homecoming dance. In order to purchase a ticket they had to sign a contract stating that they would not Freak dance, or grind. They were also not allowed to touch breasts, buttocks, or groins. The list was actually quite lengthy and I was shocked at the descriptive nature of what the school was trying to "stomp out".

First of all, as I read the contract out loud to my girls and used the words "Breasts, buttocks and groin, my youngest daughter said "GROSS!" This tells me that the idea had never her crossed her mind. Second, both my girls described the dance style completely differently, which to me meant they were not even clear on what they were not suppose too be doing. They were being punished for a select few kids that were inappropriate in the past.

My opinion is that anyone can sign a contract, piece of paper, or note. It does not change them. If you ask an idiot to sign a contract, he is still an idiot. If you expect change you have to make the change. My feeling was that if they were diligent about pulling the kids that were dancing inappropriately off the floor they would be more proactive then asking them to sign a meaningless contract. One of the things included in signing the contract was that at the dance they would be given two wrist bands. These were the sturdy paper type that you might be given at an event to let others know you had paid you admission. If an administrator felt you were inappropriate they would cut off your band, if they caught you again they pulled you from the floor. That to me was a much more proactive direction to go and would not have made the district administrators look like idiots.

What really surprised me was that at the High School parent meeting there were parents there that thought it was a great idea. They were sharing that they felt like it was a positive step for the school to take. They also felt like it would deter the kids from "Freak" dancing. Of course with all the parents that were speaking up about what a great idea it was, I decided I would keep quiet so that I did not get beat up in the parking lot. Now I am aggravated with myself for not speaking my mind. I sat there with my normally big mouth with the foot in it and kept quiet, and let other parents pat the administrators on the back for what? Signing a piece of paper is not going to stop kids from making bad choices, the parents and teachers have to make that happen. This dancing had been going on a long time and was never really dealt with, what these students needed, was diligent supervision with a warning ahead that they had two chances (wrist bands).

I am going to assume that the contract was more of a warning and a heads up of what the expectation was, but it still annoyed me. The whole thing felt like a derailed train they were trying to get back on the tracks. My girls told me that for them and their friends it took a couple hours to get comfortable and enjoy themselves. They also shared with me that there were people giving bands to others that had one cut off, which is another shining example of the ingenuity of our youth. Perhaps the fact that they were handed the bands and they put them on themselves, so they could adjust how loose or tight they would be was not the best decision either. For now it is over and I can relax until next year, mean time I am going to work on not being intimidated by the other parents at the high school meetings…wish me luck.