Day 321 The Perfect Mom Project

Slow and steady wins the race, that's what Aesop once said in his fable about the Tortoise and the Hare. I believe I have my own tortoise living right here in my home. I say that because although it took a ridiculously long time Avery's room is clean once again. It's the continuing saga of girl versus mom in this season of "Clean your room!"

 I had told Avery that in order to have the sleep over she wanted so badly (with her girlfriends in a tent in our backyard) we would have to go beyond the normal cram the stuff anywhere cleaning and do some heavy duty throw out the broken down stuff you are not using cleaning. It was not easy, but I kept my mouth shut…OK, not completely shut, because that is not possible for me, but basically I would ask every so often "How ya doing Avery?" To which Avery would respond "Good". This went on for two days and finally Avery came to me yesterday afternoon and asked me if I would like to see her closet. "Absolutely, show me the way." I replied with apprehension in my voice and biting my lip. After all the hours she spent locked in her room, I worried that I would have to tell her it just was not good enough, and that was making me nervous. As I stepped into the room and turned the corner, the glare from the shining closet almost blinded me. "Avery, this is wonderful! It really looks great!" I told her.

 In my mind I was thinking to myself that she had accomplished this without me standing over her and beating her down with my words. Not once did I suggest she throw anything out or clean out her drawers or even clean behind her bed, she made those decisions all on her own. In her very slow methodical way, Avery had cleaned her room to perfection. It was absolutely amazing. Along with her cleaning perfection came a reminder for me that my youngest is not me. She does not work like I do or even care about doing things the way I do, and if I leave her alone, she can accomplish things in her own time and in her own way. Take that "Mom", if that's your real name! It was a real A HA moment for me. It really makes sense when you think about it. They say alcoholics will not recover until they want to, and it works the same for most anything in life. You are not going to put 100% of your energy into something you do not believe in or want. Avery wanted to clean her room her way, in her own time. I let her do that and today we are both winners! Her sleepover did not work out quite as planned, she ended up at her friend's house instead of them coming here, but I ended up with the cleanest room she has ever had, all without a nagging Mom. I am really starting to get the hang of this Mom thing, today is a good day!!