The Compromise

Well, as you know I was headed to see my Great Aunt this weekend. Once again I should tell you that the word great is only to remind you where she stands in the family pecking order. Aunt Nina was my Grandmother's sister. These two women were constantly fighting about something. My Aunt still complains about my beloved Grandmother and she has been gone over 15 years.

Anyway, Mark and I trekked the 40 minutes to see Aunt Nina on Saturday. I should confess that we did stop for a glass of wine before we headed into the lion's den. Not that alcohol is a good choice when dealing with stress; it was more of a stalling component. I had made plans with Anna to meet us there so that we could resolve this ridiculous dilemma and move on. When Mark and I arrived, Anna was already there. That was not part of the plan, she was suppose to come after us, but whatever, we did stop for wine, so we were all playing by our own rules apparently.

Once we settled in to chat we asked Anna to step out and give us some time to talk with my Aunt. We asked my Aunt what was going on and she began telling us tales about her and Anna. She embellished each story so that Anna always looked like the bad guy. She even told us how Anna had said she had a funeral and then did not call or come in afterwards…horrors! At one point she jumped into a story about something that I was familiar with that had been a clear misjudgment on my Aunts part. Anna had stepped in to keep her from making a fool out of herself and this had made my Aunt angry. Anna had called me after this incident to let me know what had happened and I was horrified to hear what my Aunt had done (it is a long story and I am over it). As my Aunt was spinning her story I started to interrupt her to set her straight and stopped myself.

What good would it do to set her straight? What I really wanted was not to lose Anna, so I listened quietly. When she was through I explained that we need Anna. When she has appointments and needs, Anna is our go to gal. While Mark and I handle the background of my Aunts life (fiancés, making appointments, checking on her house, her mail and her toiletries and clothing needs) I do not think she realizes that we do not have time to do all the day to day functions that Anna helps her with including trying to keep her from making a fool of herself. At one point we expressed to her that we needed Anna for appointments and such and she replied "I can take a cab". Yes folks that would be me putting my half blind and half deaf Aunt in a cab…ahhh probably not!

In the end I explained we would have to meet in the middle on this and suggested cutting back to four hours each Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. Aunt Nina agreed and that is where we stand now. My next card would have been that if she did not keep Anna, we would have to move her closer to where we live to make it more convenient. I am glad I did not have to play that card. Immediately after the negotiations ended we found out that Aunt Nina had broken a tooth and needed to go to the dentist. I wanted to yell, SEE, you already need Anna, but I decided I should be humble about our agreement. I am sure my Grandma is looking down shaking her head and saying "This is exactly what I have been talking about for years!"