Beautiful

A friend of mine who runs the non-profit group A Beautiful Me recently shared this information, "According to a survey by Dove Soap, only 2% of women around the world choose beautiful to describe their looks. This lack of identification with "beautiful" holds across all age groups." This information is shocking but not surprising. When is the last time you thought of yourself as beautiful? Have you looked in the mirror when you are brushing your teeth or washing your face and taken a good hard look at yourself? How about when you apply your lipstick do you look at yourself then, or just your lips?

After reading the comment from Dove, I started thinking about this and I realized how rarely I actually look at myself in the mirror. I wash my face and put on make-up, brush my teeth and do my hair or pluck it, but I rarely take a good look at myself. When I do look at myself, I am busy looking at the flaws. The wrinkles and bags and grey hairs and every other conceived flaw, I really never look at myself and think I am beautiful. So how do I change this? How do I begin to see myself differently? How can I be more forgiving to myself?

I started by Googling "How to see beauty in yourself" thinking this was a good 2011 problem resolution. I was certain someone, somewhere had all the answers. Well, not so much. The truth is nothing really came up. There were some articles about finding beauty in life and in nature but there was nothing specifically about finding beauty in you. Now what?

Next I started thinking about how often I will watch a friend or unsuspecting stranger and marvel at how beautiful they are. I then spend time wishing I was more like them, or wanting the beautiful hair or eyes or figure that they have. Never do I consider that I might have any of those things, because as I have mentioned before, I rarely look at myself in the mirror. I saw a quote from Comedian Roseanne Barr recently she said "Beauty comes in all sizes, not just size 5". Somehow through that comment I find myself realizing that I am not the only woman who suffers from the issue of comparing. It seems to be something that is quite common place among all women.

So, what's next? How do I work toward realizing my beauty inside and out? The thought comes to mind that perhaps I need to really look at myself in the mirror, not just a cursory glance, but a good hard look. Dropping the judgment and opening my heart to who I am. Looking at myself as I would a friend or stranger and showering myself with the same admiration. There are so many people out in the world that spend time judging and criticizing others, I really do not need to help them along by picking on myself.

So today I will be spending some time admiring who I am in the mirror. I also think I will write myself a love letter. In the letter I will remind myself of the beauty I have inside and out. If I am bold enough in the next few days, I may ask a few friends to talk with me about what they consider beautiful about me and I will do the same for them. This in particular will be the hardest thing to do since it is difficult to accept these comments from others, but most often people see things in you and about you that you do not see. Last of all I want to begin work on my vision of myself. This is different than a dream board, because it will require me to be very honest about what I see in me. As I see something new, or a friend spotlights something I have not seen, I will add this to my vision board.

Slowly, the beauty that I have denied myself will emerge and bloom. I am excited. Honestly it is for the best that Google could not offer me the answers today, because I was able to really think this through and not lean on another person's idea of beauty. I will let you know how this works out. Perhaps you would like to join me in this quest? We can raise Dove's percentage by identifying our beauty together, what do you think?