The Hard Place

It is not an easy place to be. You are not even near a rock, you are just flat up against a hard place and you have no idea where to go. I have been there, many times. I remember being home with my daughter Ashleigh and having no idea where my husband was, I had no money, no diapers and no way to get them. I waited all night and all day and I had no idea what to do. That was a really hard place.

I spent a lot of time thinking during that time and made some decisions. I was tired of his drinking, I was tired of his stealing and I was tired of his lying and I did not want my daughter to grow up with someone like that, so when my husband finally came home, I told him to pack his stuff and get out. I had decided that if I was going to live like this I would rather be alone and count on myself and not have to wonder what might happen next. It would seem like that would be a hard place, but it was a blast through the hard place. I was going to move forward, it was going to be hard, but I knew I could count on me. I have made some mistakes since then, but I have NEVER regretted taking control of my life and moving forward.

I have also had other hard places since then, but I learned that day that I can take care of me and I can get through the hard stuff and I am worth it. There is nothing I want more then for my girls to know that they can take care of themselves and they are always capable of making their own safe place to fall, they just have to believe in themselves. Hard places come and they go but when you know you can count on yourself those spots just do not seem so hard. The hard place is still a tough spot, but you know once you climb over the first one that you have it made and the next hard spot seems a little easier, because you just learned who you can count on in a pinch…yourself!