Life Takes Hold

Recently my husband and I went on vacation. My sister and brother-in-law came with us and we had a wonderful time. Literally enjoying fun in the sun. As everyone knows, you have to come home sooner or later which we did. The trip home was bitter sweet. Not only were we leaving sunshine and warm temperatures, the day after we arrived home, my husband had to leave for two weeks out of town for work. I did my very best at being supportive and loving and got him ready for his trip. He left bright and early the very next day...UGH.

There was no after trip reminiscing, no random laughing about events that happened just piles of laundry, packing, and getting ready to leave again. Life took hold and there was no turning back. I hear what your thinking, you don't feel bad for me because I just had a wonderful vacation. I also heard you say "Suck it up Buttercup!" Its not necessary to be mean, I know how fortunate I was to go away, but something about the last few weeks of this new year feels empty. I have rushed through every moment because life is in a hurry right now and honestly it has been hard to savor any of it. 

All I'm asking for is a little time to get completely on the horse. What I mean is these last few weeks feel a bit like I climbed on a horse and it took off before my foot was in the second stirrup. I have not completely gotten myself on track for this year and spring is already hinting that it wants to join the party. Life has taken hold and it is shoving me forward. Please make it stop!

How can I enjoy what is happening when I'm hurdling towards the next thing. How do I stop my mind from waving the pity party flag when I feel kind of cheated out of time? To top things off now the birds are all chirping and excited about spring coming and I'm sitting here thinking "Hold on just a dog gone minute will ya?!" Who doesn't like chirping birds? This is where I start to really worry about myself. Usually this time of year I am fighting the winter blues and this year I am fighting off the rushed to much crabby pants syndrome. 

There is no real answer other than letting go and letting life do its thing. I'm lucky to have that option. I need to stop letting the pace of things decide my mood and just go all in with each moment that comes my way. I morbidly think that one of those fleeting moments may one day be my last and if I allow myself to push aside the joy because something else is coming along I am only cheating, you guessed it, ME! Maybe just being home in between each moment of life can be my touch stone. From home I can regroup, take hold of my life vine and swing out into the treasures that life always has waiting for me.