It's My Own Fault

At this point, I can blame no one but myself. I have once again volunteered for something and while I am excited about it, I am also aware that my hair may catch on fire on and off throughout the next year. Years ago a friend told me that she thought I was not happy unless I was busy and I think she was right. I also know that as time goes on I think I want to be busier than I actually do.

All that being said, I also like a challenge, working with other people and feeling useful and productive, all things that come from volunteering or working and since I do not have a job at this time, volunteering will have to fill the bill. If in the middle of all this I am overwhelmed it is my own fault. No one forced me to agree to help head up this committee; it was probably the same feeling that people with any addiction get that came over me last night.

I could feel myself getting excited and my mind was telling me to go for it while my subconscious was telling me not to do it. There was also the feeling that I was needed which is a huge addiction of mine that I cannot ignore…EVER! So again, it is my own fault if there are rough patches in my year ahead.

Feel free to remind me if you hear me complain that I was well aware of what I was getting myself into and yet walked right into the responsibility with my eyes wide open and my gums flapping. All I ask is that you don’t judge me about my addiction. We all have something we do to fill an empty spot and if you start pointing fingers at others about their addictions you might get called out about your own.

This situation is all my fault and I am going to stand up and take responsibility for my actions with the codicil that I may complain a wee bit (or a lot) from time to time, but that will be nothing unusual for me.