And Then There was One

I have one child left here at home to focus on and I am certain that I am going to drive her insane. I have endless great suggestions for her. Some she appreciates, many she does not. I have cool things I want to share, for example the random beautiful sunflowers that grew from the birds dropping their seeds as they eat from our bird feeder or the new dog harnesses that keep our dogs from pulling when I walk them. I have so many interesting stories to share if I could only get my youngest daughter to come out of her room and visit with me.

I’m pretty sure she has built a cocoon in her room and in a few short months she will emerge as a butterfly would, fully grown, beautiful and ready to fly away into the world. Each day I try to squeeze in one more thought or one more lesson of life, but the clock is ticking. Soon my impressions will no longer matter my youngest child will have to take the helm and steer her life in the direction she wants it to go. My time will be up.

It has come to me that by thinking that I no longer will have influence I have created a state of panic in myself. A feeling of I better hurry or I will not complete my task of parenting. The truth is my influence is already in place and if I just step back, just the tiniest bit and let my daughter be, she steps up and moves flawlessly forward. She is still going to have work to do, to finish the big steps ahead, but if I let go a little everyday and encourage her a little more, this beautiful butterfly of mine will take off strong. There is just one child left in my hands to care and love and as long as she will put up with my moments of panic and love me anyway we may get through this.