It has only been a week, but I am still not in the swing of this whole school thing. I miss how quiet my house was in the morning during the summer. I also miss not having something going on every day. This week is packed.
Mark is coaching Avery's team in soccer this year, and that starts Wednesday. There will be practices every Wednesday, with games every Saturday and some Thursday evenings, for 8 weeks. I have never been a very good Soccer Mom. I just do not enjoy sitting in the freezing cold, or the rain. I do not understand the game which makes it even less interesting. The best part for me is when I know one of the moms that is there for a game. Then I have what Mark calls "a little friend to play with". The upside is that with Mark as coach I do not have to run back and forth to the practices. I know it sounds selfish, but trust me when my girls were in dance I was driving them a lot farther and sat a lot longer waiting for their little tutu's to be done!
We also have an Open House on Tuesday night at the middle school and one at the high school Wednesday night. The Open Houses are a necessary evil. I really do not like going, but I do like seeing who the girls have for a teacher, it helps me understand what the girls are talking about when they have a problem with a teacher. Sometimes you can just tell at Open House what the teacher is like. Sometimes the girls will complain about a teacher and I know from meeting the teacher that it is more the girls problem then it is the teacher. Other times just meeting the teacher you know that they had better do their work and stay under the radar as best as they can. Good things to know in the parenting jungle!
Mainly it is a drag to be on the go every evening. I find myself already fantasizing about Friday night and it is only Monday morning. I am sure with everything we have to do, the week will speed by and I will not be the worse for wear, but looking at it up front it seems like Mount Everest! So I will go pack my survival gear and prepare for the week ahead.
Monday, September 14, 2009
Sunday, September 13, 2009
Day 21 The Perfect Mom Project
I have now been writing this blog for 21 days. Wow, 21 days can you believe it? Mark has told me that at Dale Carnegie he learned it takes 21 days to make a habit. I definitely have a habit. If I am not able to write first thing in the morning I am very frustrated! This morning was a little slow due to the anniversary celebrating we did yesterday. Great day though, I just love my guy!
Anyway, back to the purpose of this blog, my kids. A weird thing happened on Friday morning. I was downstairs writing and asked Avery (who was upstairs eating breakfast) if she would feed Roxanne our dog. Once Roxanne was done eating I went upstairs to take her for a quick walk. Avery was finishing up breakfast and we chatted for a minute. I figured I would get Roxanne out before Avery had to leave for school and then I would wish her a good day and see her off. I know sounds sweet doesn't it?
Roxanne was delighted to be out and kept walking farther and farther from the house, and I was getting aggravated, because I wanted to get home to Avery. I finally dragged the dog back home and came in the back door. Right away I noticed that Avery's cereal bowl was off the table and the lights were out. That's weird, where is Avery? I started calling downstairs and down the hall. I went to her room and opened the door and I checked the downstairs bathroom. I was starting to panic. Where could she be? In order for her to get to the bus she has to go down the street I was just on. I ran out the back door and looked down the street. I ran to the back yard and looked towards the bus stop that she walks to. Nothing, now, I am really worried!
How could someone come in here and take her without me even seeing, oh my God!! As a last resort, I jumped in my car and raced to the bus stop to see if she was there, and there she was. What the heck? She came running over to the car, "Mom, before you say anything, I looked everywhere for you, I called downstairs and I even looked outside. I was afraid I was going to miss the bus!" At that point I did not care what happened, I was just happy I found her. We figured out that while I was coming in the back door she was walking down the front sidewalk. So about the time she was out of sight I was calling for her. Phew, what a relief. I was so happy to have my baby back!!
This incident reminded me of years ago when we took all our girls to Disney world for Halloween. We were so excited, because we were going to trick or treat on Halloween in the Magic Kingdom, what fun!! Ashleigh was dressed like Minnie Mouse and Aly was dressed like Pooh Bear. Avery had on the cutest dragon costume! As we were walking around the Magic Kingdom we found a place where you could meet the characters and get thier autograph. That sounded like fun to the kids, so we got in line. The way it worked was that they would open the doors to this room and let a small group in at a time. When it came to our turn we were so excited. I wanted Aly to have her picture taken with Pooh Bear in the worst way, I could not wait.
As things settled down from the previous group leaving and our group coming in I began to pose with the characters. Of course, along with the cute photos of the kids I wanted some of me too! That is when Mark said to me, "Ragen wheres Aly"? I had no idea where she was! Well at this point the Disney staff was on it! They started radioing people and locking down the area. Well, as some of you might know, whenever you leave a Disney ride, exhibit or anything, you have to go through a store, so we ran out the exit doors hoping to find her. And there was our little Pooh, roaming around the store shopping, she was 3 years old and already into retail! She had walked out with the group that was ahead of us when the door had opened and did not even realize we were not with her. Another, PHEW occasion!
I do not consider myself an over protective mother, but when things like this happen I become so overwhelmed. The thought of anything happening to my children is too much to even consider. My Great Aunt who is 91, lost her only child who was in her 50's about 3 years ago. She has told me that some days she can barely take the pain. I can not even imagine what that must be like. I can only guess from the little moments of panic that I have felt that the pain is beyond words. My heart breaks for her. I thank God that I am able to hug my girls and kiss them and even be annoyed by them. How lucky am I? Real Lucky!
Anyway, back to the purpose of this blog, my kids. A weird thing happened on Friday morning. I was downstairs writing and asked Avery (who was upstairs eating breakfast) if she would feed Roxanne our dog. Once Roxanne was done eating I went upstairs to take her for a quick walk. Avery was finishing up breakfast and we chatted for a minute. I figured I would get Roxanne out before Avery had to leave for school and then I would wish her a good day and see her off. I know sounds sweet doesn't it?
Roxanne was delighted to be out and kept walking farther and farther from the house, and I was getting aggravated, because I wanted to get home to Avery. I finally dragged the dog back home and came in the back door. Right away I noticed that Avery's cereal bowl was off the table and the lights were out. That's weird, where is Avery? I started calling downstairs and down the hall. I went to her room and opened the door and I checked the downstairs bathroom. I was starting to panic. Where could she be? In order for her to get to the bus she has to go down the street I was just on. I ran out the back door and looked down the street. I ran to the back yard and looked towards the bus stop that she walks to. Nothing, now, I am really worried!
How could someone come in here and take her without me even seeing, oh my God!! As a last resort, I jumped in my car and raced to the bus stop to see if she was there, and there she was. What the heck? She came running over to the car, "Mom, before you say anything, I looked everywhere for you, I called downstairs and I even looked outside. I was afraid I was going to miss the bus!" At that point I did not care what happened, I was just happy I found her. We figured out that while I was coming in the back door she was walking down the front sidewalk. So about the time she was out of sight I was calling for her. Phew, what a relief. I was so happy to have my baby back!!
This incident reminded me of years ago when we took all our girls to Disney world for Halloween. We were so excited, because we were going to trick or treat on Halloween in the Magic Kingdom, what fun!! Ashleigh was dressed like Minnie Mouse and Aly was dressed like Pooh Bear. Avery had on the cutest dragon costume! As we were walking around the Magic Kingdom we found a place where you could meet the characters and get thier autograph. That sounded like fun to the kids, so we got in line. The way it worked was that they would open the doors to this room and let a small group in at a time. When it came to our turn we were so excited. I wanted Aly to have her picture taken with Pooh Bear in the worst way, I could not wait.
As things settled down from the previous group leaving and our group coming in I began to pose with the characters. Of course, along with the cute photos of the kids I wanted some of me too! That is when Mark said to me, "Ragen wheres Aly"? I had no idea where she was! Well at this point the Disney staff was on it! They started radioing people and locking down the area. Well, as some of you might know, whenever you leave a Disney ride, exhibit or anything, you have to go through a store, so we ran out the exit doors hoping to find her. And there was our little Pooh, roaming around the store shopping, she was 3 years old and already into retail! She had walked out with the group that was ahead of us when the door had opened and did not even realize we were not with her. Another, PHEW occasion!
I do not consider myself an over protective mother, but when things like this happen I become so overwhelmed. The thought of anything happening to my children is too much to even consider. My Great Aunt who is 91, lost her only child who was in her 50's about 3 years ago. She has told me that some days she can barely take the pain. I can not even imagine what that must be like. I can only guess from the little moments of panic that I have felt that the pain is beyond words. My heart breaks for her. I thank God that I am able to hug my girls and kiss them and even be annoyed by them. How lucky am I? Real Lucky!
Saturday, September 12, 2009
Day 20 The Perfect Mom Project
Today is my 17th wedding anniversary. Believe it or not that is the longest I have ever lived with anyone except my oldest daughter Ashleigh. The fact that Mark has been able to hang in there this long, gives me a little confidence that maybe I'm not to bad to live with. Having a loving and supportive husband like Mark helps me to be a good Mom to my girls.
When we first met I was dating someone else. It was not someone that I thought of as a "keeper", so when Mark and I met I immediately knew he was the man for me. We joke about it now, but after our second meeting, he hugged me goodbye and said "Try not to miss me too much!". I was horrified, did he know I liked him? How did he know? I figured he had bigger fish to fry and would not have any interest in me. I was wrong. Later after I told him this story he laughed and said he had a habit back then of always saying that when he was leaving. Real funny, freak a poor girl out why don't you!
With Mark in my life I have the unconditional love that I never had before. Mark is truly my soul mate. There are times when I will think something and turn to him to tell him and he will already be saying it to me. We are fortunate that we can talk about almost anything. His sense of humor continues to keep us laughing. Actually his humor was one of the reasons I fell in love with him. I do not think I ever have laughed as much as I do now with Mark, however I know that Mark would be the first to tell you that his sense of humor does get on my nerves sometimes. Our girls have also developed a great sense of humor and I believe it is because we do laugh so much at home.
My husband has gone to marriage weekends, Marriage book studies, and getaway weekends trying to keep our relationship strong. I can not imagine my life without him. With Mark's love I have been able to accomplish things that I never thought I would. One of the most important things is my children. I have a true gift in the chance to mother these spirits.
My love for Mark continues to grow and I hope as we celebrate today that we can enjoy spending time together, laughing and talking. Perhaps we will cook together which is something else we like to do. I know no matter what we will have a great day. The best part is that we will have many more of those days to follow. Happy Anniversary Mark, I love you!
When we first met I was dating someone else. It was not someone that I thought of as a "keeper", so when Mark and I met I immediately knew he was the man for me. We joke about it now, but after our second meeting, he hugged me goodbye and said "Try not to miss me too much!". I was horrified, did he know I liked him? How did he know? I figured he had bigger fish to fry and would not have any interest in me. I was wrong. Later after I told him this story he laughed and said he had a habit back then of always saying that when he was leaving. Real funny, freak a poor girl out why don't you!
With Mark in my life I have the unconditional love that I never had before. Mark is truly my soul mate. There are times when I will think something and turn to him to tell him and he will already be saying it to me. We are fortunate that we can talk about almost anything. His sense of humor continues to keep us laughing. Actually his humor was one of the reasons I fell in love with him. I do not think I ever have laughed as much as I do now with Mark, however I know that Mark would be the first to tell you that his sense of humor does get on my nerves sometimes. Our girls have also developed a great sense of humor and I believe it is because we do laugh so much at home.
My husband has gone to marriage weekends, Marriage book studies, and getaway weekends trying to keep our relationship strong. I can not imagine my life without him. With Mark's love I have been able to accomplish things that I never thought I would. One of the most important things is my children. I have a true gift in the chance to mother these spirits.
My love for Mark continues to grow and I hope as we celebrate today that we can enjoy spending time together, laughing and talking. Perhaps we will cook together which is something else we like to do. I know no matter what we will have a great day. The best part is that we will have many more of those days to follow. Happy Anniversary Mark, I love you!
Friday, September 11, 2009
Day 19 The Perfect Mom Project
With any project you have details that you must attend to so that at the end you have a finished product. Since Mothering perfection is my product, I feel it necessary to attend the parent meetings at my children's school and I also like to attend all of the other events that they have to support the schools. By participating I feel that not only do I know what is happening in the school and helping make the school a better place, I am also letting my children know that school is important. It does not hurt that I am then comfortable speaking to the different teachers and administrators at each school and they are also comfortable enough with me to share openly about my children. It is a win, win situation.
Yesterday was the first Parent club meeting at my daughter Avery's middle school. The first meeting is usually fun, because you see Moms that you have not seen all summer and you can spend a little time catching up with them. I like to think of it as networking, because you never know when you might have to ask advice about, (or recruit some help for) a school event, or even just meet someone that you can eventually become good friends with, which is my favorite part. Beside the socializing, I enjoy the meetings because we are able to learn quite a bit about what is going on at the school and in the district.
As I sat there at the meeting chatting with a friend and sipping a cup of coffee, the meeting began. I found myself not as focused as I normally am. I am not sure if it was being tired or if it was that this was my fifth and final year of the beginning of the year speech that the principal gives. Regardless, my mind was wondering. In my fog I thought I heard my name, and then I realize that the principal has just asked me to do something. Great, my cover was blown now this entire room full of Moms knew that I was not paying attention. So with what little pride I had left I looked at him and said "What did you want me to do? I was not paying attention". He then asked me to start off the group by saying my name and the name of my child and what grade they were in. To top things off a little later my cell phone rang. I am apparently not quite ready to go back to school!
I am hoping that this lack luster attitude is just temporary and not a symptom of a bigger issue. Hopefully, I am not slowly going to the dark side of uncaring indifference. I am not sure if I would do well there. Being a perfect mom would allude me if I start down that path and then where would I be? Perhaps a year of writing about what it is like to be on the dark side. Hhhhmmn...I will have to think about this.
Yesterday was the first Parent club meeting at my daughter Avery's middle school. The first meeting is usually fun, because you see Moms that you have not seen all summer and you can spend a little time catching up with them. I like to think of it as networking, because you never know when you might have to ask advice about, (or recruit some help for) a school event, or even just meet someone that you can eventually become good friends with, which is my favorite part. Beside the socializing, I enjoy the meetings because we are able to learn quite a bit about what is going on at the school and in the district.
As I sat there at the meeting chatting with a friend and sipping a cup of coffee, the meeting began. I found myself not as focused as I normally am. I am not sure if it was being tired or if it was that this was my fifth and final year of the beginning of the year speech that the principal gives. Regardless, my mind was wondering. In my fog I thought I heard my name, and then I realize that the principal has just asked me to do something. Great, my cover was blown now this entire room full of Moms knew that I was not paying attention. So with what little pride I had left I looked at him and said "What did you want me to do? I was not paying attention". He then asked me to start off the group by saying my name and the name of my child and what grade they were in. To top things off a little later my cell phone rang. I am apparently not quite ready to go back to school!
I am hoping that this lack luster attitude is just temporary and not a symptom of a bigger issue. Hopefully, I am not slowly going to the dark side of uncaring indifference. I am not sure if I would do well there. Being a perfect mom would allude me if I start down that path and then where would I be? Perhaps a year of writing about what it is like to be on the dark side. Hhhhmmn...I will have to think about this.
Thursday, September 10, 2009
Day 18 The Perfect Mom Project
As I sit here this morning I hear the voices of my girls flowing down the stairs. They do not sound like they are getting along, so I think I will cower here for a little while. They are both at an interesting age...THE TEEN YEARS. There are days that they will argue about the stupidest things. This morning I think it is about a comb.
Last night I asked them to take care of their chore of emptying the trash cans upstairs and taking it outside (This is a once a week task, and I always have to remind them to do it). They split up the rooms and emptied the cans. I had been downstairs for some reason and when I came up, there was the kitchen trash can full of all the trash just sitting in the middle of the kitchen. HHHMMMN? So I asked "Um, can someone please take care of the trash?", and their response was "we did". We then got into a discussion about the trash needing to go outside, just like every other week. Seriously, how old are you people?
My youngest Avery decided to take out the trash, but then she came in and balked at my request that she put a fresh trash bag in the can. She felt she had done her share and that Aly should do that part. Oh, for peat's sake! A simple task that seems to cause so much trouble. Sometimes, I wonder if they cook this stuff up so that I become disgusted and do it myself. The thing is I am on to them, I know what they are up to and I will not give in.
I stumbled on the show "Supernanny" the other day and watched as she showed the family a point system that would include rewards at various plateaus. I am seriously thinking about trying that on these two. Perhaps it would at least be more motivating and chores would get done with enthusiasm. I am sure that you are chuckling to yourself as you read this, thinking I am a fool, but any port in a storm! My biggest problem with things like this reward system is actually remembering and sticking with it.
I think my chart will have things on it like, 3 points if you do something without arguing, 2 points if you do the trash without being reminded. I will probably give 15 or 20 points if they don't argue all day (I know, good luck with that one!). First, I will have to remember to make the chart and then I will have to remember to actually use it. I don't know, maybe I will think about this a little more, I am not sure I want to work that hard.
Over all they are great kids, its just that I would like a little less feedback when I ask them to do things around the house. Jeez, you would think sometimes that I asked them to run out in front of a car. I am going to mull over this whole chart idea, the crazy thing just might work, but what I really need to work are my kids! Here goes another day in the mothering jungle, wish me luck!
Last night I asked them to take care of their chore of emptying the trash cans upstairs and taking it outside (This is a once a week task, and I always have to remind them to do it). They split up the rooms and emptied the cans. I had been downstairs for some reason and when I came up, there was the kitchen trash can full of all the trash just sitting in the middle of the kitchen. HHHMMMN? So I asked "Um, can someone please take care of the trash?", and their response was "we did". We then got into a discussion about the trash needing to go outside, just like every other week. Seriously, how old are you people?
My youngest Avery decided to take out the trash, but then she came in and balked at my request that she put a fresh trash bag in the can. She felt she had done her share and that Aly should do that part. Oh, for peat's sake! A simple task that seems to cause so much trouble. Sometimes, I wonder if they cook this stuff up so that I become disgusted and do it myself. The thing is I am on to them, I know what they are up to and I will not give in.
I stumbled on the show "Supernanny" the other day and watched as she showed the family a point system that would include rewards at various plateaus. I am seriously thinking about trying that on these two. Perhaps it would at least be more motivating and chores would get done with enthusiasm. I am sure that you are chuckling to yourself as you read this, thinking I am a fool, but any port in a storm! My biggest problem with things like this reward system is actually remembering and sticking with it.
I think my chart will have things on it like, 3 points if you do something without arguing, 2 points if you do the trash without being reminded. I will probably give 15 or 20 points if they don't argue all day (I know, good luck with that one!). First, I will have to remember to make the chart and then I will have to remember to actually use it. I don't know, maybe I will think about this a little more, I am not sure I want to work that hard.
Over all they are great kids, its just that I would like a little less feedback when I ask them to do things around the house. Jeez, you would think sometimes that I asked them to run out in front of a car. I am going to mull over this whole chart idea, the crazy thing just might work, but what I really need to work are my kids! Here goes another day in the mothering jungle, wish me luck!
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
Day 17 The Perfect Mom Project
The other morning at about 2:00 AM my dog decided she needed to go outside. I was beat, and was not thrilled at the idea of prancing around my yard with the dog. However, nature was calling and I must answer. I got up and headed to the back door with Roxanne (now you are probably singing the Sting song in your head, right?). I was putting her leash on her and preparing to head out when I remembered that I had removed my pajama bottoms earlier, because I was hot. I stood there for a good two minutes trying to decide if I could get her out for natures call and back inside without anyone seeing me. The fact that I had to think about it or even considered going out without my bottoms has made me remember last winter when I had another decision to make.
It was a cold winter morning. Another icy day in a string of icy days. We had more snow then we could remember having in a very long time. I was busy doing my normal morning Mom routine of yelling out reminders to Avery as she prepared for school. Things like "Got your home work?", "Brush your teeth." and my favorite, "YOU BETTER HURRY!". All this while I sipped on my coffee in my bathrobe and slippers. AAHHH this is the life.
Since it was cold and icy out I told Avery I would drive her up to the bus stop. This one thing wins me more brownie points. The best part is that not only do I get a special "Thanks Mom, I love you" I also get some one on one time with my daughter. I ran to my room and threw on a pair of sweatpants, grabbed my coat and threw on a little rubber slip on shoe. Off we went. I brought my coffee so I could continue my relaxing morning while I visited with my daughter at the bus stop. The bus soon came and she was on her way. I turned the car around and headed home.
As I walked in the door of the house and was popping off my shoes, I see her lunch sitting on the kitchen counter. All those reminders and I had missed one, "Don't forget your lunch!". My mind started racing, how could I get this lunch to her without having to go up to the school? I had an idea, I would jump back in the car and run to the next bus stop and ask one of her friends to give it to her. Off I went.
My husband had taken my four wheel drive car to work that day, since I had plans to take my 91 year old Aunt out to lunch. She has a hard time getting in and out of my big car. So I jumped in his little car and sped off. I was so proud of myself, smug actually. I am so clever. I headed to what I knew was the last stop on the route, planning to drop her lunch with a neighbor girl. I drove down our road towards the last stop in the sub. As I got closer I realized I would have to go up a very steep hill, not a problem.
I cruised on up to the top of the hill. The neighbor girl was not there, great, now what? I will just turn around and find another stop. I hit the gas planning to turn the corner and head to the next stop down the road. Now I was desperate! The tires on the car started spinning but the car was going no where. Darn it! OK, I think to myself, I will just back down the hill. I put the car in reverse and started backing down. I probably forgot to mention that white snow does not offer a great visual when you are backing up. I drove sideways and bumped into a snow pile. At this point I am a little nervous, I kept thinking, I have no purse, no cell phone, I am in my robe and slippers, not good. I pull forward and make another attempt at backing down the hill. This time I slid right into the ditch on the side of the road "poof" gently landing in a huge pile of snow.
And there I sat, staring out the window. Now what! I decided that the only course of action was to get out of the car and run to the house at the top of the hill for help. I was hoping their daughter would be getting ready to get on the bus and she could give Avery her lunch and I could get help too. I knock on the door, dressed like a desperate housewife (not the pretty TV kind), and the Dad opens the door. "Is Natalie here?" I ask. He responds "Ah no, she is on the bus, she gets on the bus first now." Of course she does, I am thinking. Well, I explain to him what has happened and he offers to help me and heads off to get his coat and boots (what a good idea!). In the mean time I hear the bus heading down the road. I yelled "I'll be right back!" and headed towards the end of their driveway hoping to flag down the bus and finally get rid of the stupid lunch! Waving my arms frantically the bus driver sees me and stops.
I was delighted one of my ideas had worked. I did not care that I was in my slippers and robe and coat in the middle of the road, I just wanted to get this lunch to Avery and move on! The bus driver surprisingly did not bat an eye as she took the lunch and passed it back. I told the driver to let Avery know that this was the last time I was bringing her lunch to her! And that was it, she had her lunch and they drove off leaving me standing at the end of the driveway wondering how in the heck I was going to get back home. Fortunately my neighbor gave me a ride home so that I could call a tow truck and have the car pulled from the ditch.
Avery now knows that I will never bring her lunch to her ever again, and plans ahead most days. While I looked like an idiot for my antics on the one hand, you have to admit I was a really good Mom that day, not letting anything stand in my way of getting my daughter"s lunch to her. So, I am not really sure why I had to think about whether or not I should get my pajama bottoms on. I am pretty sure that would have been the beginning of another great story.
It was a cold winter morning. Another icy day in a string of icy days. We had more snow then we could remember having in a very long time. I was busy doing my normal morning Mom routine of yelling out reminders to Avery as she prepared for school. Things like "Got your home work?", "Brush your teeth." and my favorite, "YOU BETTER HURRY!". All this while I sipped on my coffee in my bathrobe and slippers. AAHHH this is the life.
Since it was cold and icy out I told Avery I would drive her up to the bus stop. This one thing wins me more brownie points. The best part is that not only do I get a special "Thanks Mom, I love you" I also get some one on one time with my daughter. I ran to my room and threw on a pair of sweatpants, grabbed my coat and threw on a little rubber slip on shoe. Off we went. I brought my coffee so I could continue my relaxing morning while I visited with my daughter at the bus stop. The bus soon came and she was on her way. I turned the car around and headed home.
As I walked in the door of the house and was popping off my shoes, I see her lunch sitting on the kitchen counter. All those reminders and I had missed one, "Don't forget your lunch!". My mind started racing, how could I get this lunch to her without having to go up to the school? I had an idea, I would jump back in the car and run to the next bus stop and ask one of her friends to give it to her. Off I went.
My husband had taken my four wheel drive car to work that day, since I had plans to take my 91 year old Aunt out to lunch. She has a hard time getting in and out of my big car. So I jumped in his little car and sped off. I was so proud of myself, smug actually. I am so clever. I headed to what I knew was the last stop on the route, planning to drop her lunch with a neighbor girl. I drove down our road towards the last stop in the sub. As I got closer I realized I would have to go up a very steep hill, not a problem.
I cruised on up to the top of the hill. The neighbor girl was not there, great, now what? I will just turn around and find another stop. I hit the gas planning to turn the corner and head to the next stop down the road. Now I was desperate! The tires on the car started spinning but the car was going no where. Darn it! OK, I think to myself, I will just back down the hill. I put the car in reverse and started backing down. I probably forgot to mention that white snow does not offer a great visual when you are backing up. I drove sideways and bumped into a snow pile. At this point I am a little nervous, I kept thinking, I have no purse, no cell phone, I am in my robe and slippers, not good. I pull forward and make another attempt at backing down the hill. This time I slid right into the ditch on the side of the road "poof" gently landing in a huge pile of snow.
And there I sat, staring out the window. Now what! I decided that the only course of action was to get out of the car and run to the house at the top of the hill for help. I was hoping their daughter would be getting ready to get on the bus and she could give Avery her lunch and I could get help too. I knock on the door, dressed like a desperate housewife (not the pretty TV kind), and the Dad opens the door. "Is Natalie here?" I ask. He responds "Ah no, she is on the bus, she gets on the bus first now." Of course she does, I am thinking. Well, I explain to him what has happened and he offers to help me and heads off to get his coat and boots (what a good idea!). In the mean time I hear the bus heading down the road. I yelled "I'll be right back!" and headed towards the end of their driveway hoping to flag down the bus and finally get rid of the stupid lunch! Waving my arms frantically the bus driver sees me and stops.
I was delighted one of my ideas had worked. I did not care that I was in my slippers and robe and coat in the middle of the road, I just wanted to get this lunch to Avery and move on! The bus driver surprisingly did not bat an eye as she took the lunch and passed it back. I told the driver to let Avery know that this was the last time I was bringing her lunch to her! And that was it, she had her lunch and they drove off leaving me standing at the end of the driveway wondering how in the heck I was going to get back home. Fortunately my neighbor gave me a ride home so that I could call a tow truck and have the car pulled from the ditch.
Avery now knows that I will never bring her lunch to her ever again, and plans ahead most days. While I looked like an idiot for my antics on the one hand, you have to admit I was a really good Mom that day, not letting anything stand in my way of getting my daughter"s lunch to her. So, I am not really sure why I had to think about whether or not I should get my pajama bottoms on. I am pretty sure that would have been the beginning of another great story.
Tuesday, September 8, 2009
Day 16 The Perfect Mom Project
Since yesterday I have done some thinking about yesterdays blog post. It does seem as though I still have some anger towards my Mom. I just feel I missed so much. Our relationship never grew up. Even when my Mom became ill with Alzheimer's disease, and cancer I struggled with how to be there for her. She might not have been a great Mom, but she was my mom and I did not want her to feel she was alone or abandoned by me. Ironic isn't it?
Honestly, I gave her as much time as I could, when she was sick, but I was never compelled to go above and beyond that. I have no regrets about that. I spent time with her before she died, and since she lived in Louisiana, it was difficult to get there very often. Sadly, I was not there when she passed, but I think in a way that was best for both of us. My Mom kind of knew who I was when I would visit, but I am not 100% sure she knew I was her daughter. That is how I felt most of my life with her. I was never sure if she knew who I was, and if she had not given birth to me, I think she would have questioned if I was her own flesh and blood.
Now, here I am in the throws of motherhood, hoping that I can change the course of family dysfunction in a single bound. Putting on my cape and throwing down the gauntlet, to fight the foe of dysfunctional mothering. This is no easy task I have taken on. There is much to do and three young womens lives could be made or broken depending on how I handle this situation. One thing is for sure, I have the drive and determination to see my task through to the end. I also have the support of my trusty sidekick Mark (my husband), which is invaluable to me. I think this might just work out well, I have a good feeling about the task ahead. However, today is the first day of our school year, so wish me luck!
Honestly, I gave her as much time as I could, when she was sick, but I was never compelled to go above and beyond that. I have no regrets about that. I spent time with her before she died, and since she lived in Louisiana, it was difficult to get there very often. Sadly, I was not there when she passed, but I think in a way that was best for both of us. My Mom kind of knew who I was when I would visit, but I am not 100% sure she knew I was her daughter. That is how I felt most of my life with her. I was never sure if she knew who I was, and if she had not given birth to me, I think she would have questioned if I was her own flesh and blood.
Now, here I am in the throws of motherhood, hoping that I can change the course of family dysfunction in a single bound. Putting on my cape and throwing down the gauntlet, to fight the foe of dysfunctional mothering. This is no easy task I have taken on. There is much to do and three young womens lives could be made or broken depending on how I handle this situation. One thing is for sure, I have the drive and determination to see my task through to the end. I also have the support of my trusty sidekick Mark (my husband), which is invaluable to me. I think this might just work out well, I have a good feeling about the task ahead. However, today is the first day of our school year, so wish me luck!
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